Dog House W/ Patio

Adieu

Six months ago I was driving across the Western United States wondering what the hell I was doing. I was about to embark on a journey across the globe and away from my friends and family. I was going to teach English in South Korea. I found my way to Illinois and saw off family and friends. I left on a high note after the marriage of two amazing people and discovered what it felt like to be touched once again. I boarded a plane the next day.

Flash-forward to November 21, 2005. I am sitting in Boston in a small room that has been sequestered to me through the graces of the same amazing people mentioned above. I am searching for employment and attempting to establish myself once again. I suppose that this might sound like I’m complaining to those of you who don’t know me too well. Those of you who do will most likely notice the pattern and chuckle a “Figures…” at this point. What I want you to know is that I truly appreciate all of you who have commented and let me know that you are reading my blog and care about what I’m doing, even if it was just for amusement.

I have done a lot in the past few months and will continue in that manner I’m sure. I hope that you will all carry me in your thoughts and emails (because we all know that I’ve forgotten how to send physical correspondence, right?) as you will be in mine.

I wish you all the best in your own adventures and hope that you are able to track me down one way or another so that we can all have a laugh reminiscing about The Nuprin Diaries.

A Fond Farewell to Come...

I’m officially at the one-week mark until I find my way onto a plane headed back to the States. I have quite a week ahead of me. I have been preparing my departure for the past few weeks so it’s a great feeling to actually arrive at crunch-time.

My replacement comes in on Wednesday night. He’s from Chicago and has a beard. The kids are going to have one hell of a time trying to tell us apart. I have an added bonus in this regard, as does he. I will be able to pass the reigns effectively, knowing that my students will not be thrown into a new teacher’s style without a frame of reference. This might sound contradictory to some other posts where I have vented about my students and their behavior. But I must say there are a handful of my students that are truly trying to learn English and subsequently have a warm place in my heart. Knowing that these students will be in good hands eases my guilt of leaving them.

I also have the fun of tracking down my diploma, closing financial accounts, and telling my students that I will be leaving on Halloween Day. This next weekend is a culmination of a few events: my last weekend, Halloween parties, and a good friend of mine’s birthday. I will be a busy man. Plus I get to carry out all this with my replacement in tow, showing him the ropes of Korea. Perhaps this is the best teaching experience I will get from my time here.

Nonetheless, I imagine that this will be the last entry that I post from Korea. I have my work cut out for me when I return as well, so for those of you that have been avid readers I have to say, “Thank you.” I truly appreciate your comments and support throughout my adventures here. I will do my best to keep this blog alive once I get back on my feet on United States soil.

I stand corrected...

I posted before that there were three ways to leave Korea:

1. To finish your contract
2. To run
3. To give proper notice

Here is a fourth way as reported by The Globe and Mail, a Canadian news source:
___________________
Korea Crackdown

By COLIN FREEZE

Monday, October 10, 2005 Posted at 4:52 AM EDT

From Monday's Globe and Mail

Nearly 50 English teachers from Canada have been detained, deported or investigated on allegations of visa fraud in South Korea, a country seeking to purge itself of young Westerners increasingly regarded as unqualified, unruly and unwelcome.

Long a magnet for foreigners drawn to working overseas, Korea has arrested hundreds of them in the past couple of weeks. Immigration officials have been rounding up dozens of teachers at their homes, work, or at the airports.

While as many as 10,000 foreigners legally teach the language at private English schools in Korea, the nation's media have been full of exposés about teachers with dubious credentials.

Many of the foreign teachers, if not most, are Canadian.

Many teachers say Korean officials and unscrupulous recruiters have long tolerated, even encouraged, the illegal activity.

Some Canadian teachers are worried that they, too, could end up in prison.

"I wish we could tell exactly how much trouble we are in," a 30-year-old Canadian teacher said in a phone interview from Kwangju, Korea, on Friday. "The idea of me being locked up and handcuffed and fed grog is ridiculous. They say what we're doing is criminal, but it doesn't feel that way."

The woman, who is from B.C., said she arrived on a spousal visa, but was enticed into teaching English illegally to supplement her husband's income.

Her husband, a legal instructor, said Korea's response is out of proportion to the situation. "We are all teaching children how to sing Row, Row, Row Your Boat, and ABC," hesaid, adding that he believes more than 150 Canadians doing this type of work have been arrested.

The couple -- who, like several other Canadians interviewed, asked not to be identified -- say they are contemplating a "midnight run" out of Korea, and complain that the local embassy has not done enough for jailed friends.

"The whole situation is totally inhumane -- I've heard of 70 [foreign teachers] being put in a room with capacity for only 30 or 40," the wife said. "It's not like they were dealing drugs or running guns."

Canada's Foreign Affairs Department says there are limitations to what it can do. It has officially logged about 50 English-teacher cases in the past two weeks: 35 have been deported, five are awaiting deportation and the rest under investigation.

"It's clear that the South Koreans are enforcing their laws in a recent wave that began as little as two weeks ago," the Foreign Affairs parliamentary secretary, Dan McTeague, said from Ottawa.

The Liberal MP warned Canadians in Korea to "make sure their credentials conform to the rigours of the law. If they don't, they are strongly advised to rethink continuing in that setting."

Many of the arrests of foreigners have followed that of a Korean man who is accused of selling fake diplomas. Many Canadians who tried to establish teaching credentials by buying fake university degrees are worried that their names have been handed over to the authorities.

One Canadian, who has taught legally in Korea for nine years and helps run an Internet message board for expatriates, is telling affected colleagues that the wisest course of action is to surrender.

"There are some people that freak out and say, 'I better get out of Dodge' -- and then they get nailed at the airport," he said.

Given that Korean authorities are believed to have an inch-thick dossier on illegal English teachers, he urged his compatriots to go a different route. "If you turn yourself in, immigration tends to take a more lenient thinking."

Like many Canadians interviewed, he said that Koreans have an innate xenophobia that has hardened of late. "There has been a definite change in the way we're being perceived in the last nine or 10 months," he said. "Before, it was, 'Please speak me English.' Now, it's 'Get out of my country, white devils.' "

Visa frauds go on in just about every country, but Korea's clampdown has been lent a sense of urgency by highly publicized accounts of immorality by young foreigners. Reports of marijuana and cocaine busts have long tended to feature Westerners -- including five Canadian teachers who were arrested two years ago.

But more recent events have led to a furor. An unknown English teacher in Korea used the Internet to post what amounted to a how-to guide for seducing Korean women. Then, two English teachers from Cape Breton, N.S., made the headlines for breaking a local man's jaw in a bar brawl. They spent 40 days in jail and were ordered to pay $30,000 (U.S.) in a form of restitution known locally as "blood money."

And lately, Korean TV has aired segments painting English teachers as inept, unqualified foreigners who frequently lie about their credentials.

"People basically think all foreign teachers are drunks and molesters who can't get a job back home," said the teacher who helps run the Internet board for expats.

___________________

Yes, I know some people who have been effected by this. I'm sure there are a few people that I'm friends with that will be mysteriously leaving. No, I don't know of anyone for sure who is here illegally.

Nevertheless, this should make for an interesting departure. I can imagine trying to leave solemnly and then end up in Korean jail for trying to leave early from my contract. This joins my other paranoia lately: that I will be quarantined upon arriving in Chicago because of the Avian Flu, having just returned from Asia.

Just the Facts...

Last weekend I went to Busan, the largest city near Ulsan, to pick up my ticket home. I now have an official date and time of my return: 3:55 pm Monday October 31st. Needless to say, I’m very excited. I also had an opportunity to play in an Ultimate Frisbee tournament at Haeundae Beach. Even though my team didn’t win I had a great time and met some cool people from all over Korea.

The last week at work has been relatively smooth. I had a few weeks of uncomfortable silence from my co-workers after I broke the news I was leaving but I think that has all subsided now.

This weekend was Canadian Thanksgiving. I was invited to attend a proper dinner party where we gorged ourselves on turkey and mashed potatoes and other traditional dishes. Yes, its pretty much the same style feast as American Thanksgiving.

Random sand sculpture. It was very cool watching this guy work.

I know I shouldn’t play with my food, but he was too cute!

This is one of my students, Jesse. She reminds me of the penguin from Wallace and Grommit.

This is an example of cultural dimorphism. These kids cannot seem to get over the fact that I have arm hair. There are times I feel like a dog. Some kids can’t help themselves from trying to pull on my arm hair or my beard. Its very much like watching a baby feeling a plush carpet.

This is Cindy, one of the smartest students I have. But you wouldn’t guess it from her shirt… Konglish strikes again!

Note: when choosing school uniforms, please pass on the Star Trek theme.

Ba-Bo (what is scrawled on the whiteboard behind me): crazy, stupid, silly, dumb, etc… I haven’t received an official definition yet, but my kids insist its crazy. Who’s ba-bo now?

These are scars from immunizations the kids get when they are younger. Almost all my kids have this pattern on their left arm. I felt bad about taking this picture, though; I asked him to flex for me so I could get a good shot. (get it?)

Sorry this shot is so dark, I let my students take a few pictures, and they turned off the flash. Note the stick on the desk. That’s what the Korean teachers use for motivation.

This is a prime example of a squatter. This takes the place of a conventional toilet. The waste bin in the corner is where you put your used toilet paper. If I hadn’t been to Mexico, this would be disturbing to me.

Here’s an amusing shot of Dave, Heather, Tamsyn, and myself.

Two chingus in Ko-rea.

Its Midnight, Do You Know Where Your Waygukin Is?

There are a few ways to leave Korea. I shall tell you what they are along with their commonly reported side effects. By no means are these scientific and I do not speak for everyone when reporting them (but I'm going off what I've noticed and heard throughout my time here).

The first, and most common, way is to finish your contract and then get the hell out of Dodge. This usually is accompanied by a rude hand gesture and a thorough disdain for the country and its culture. The second is to tell your director that you are moving on (for whatever reason) within a month or more of your departure. A feeling of satisfaction and a hint of shame that slowly dissipates once you realize that you are leaving in a respectful manner usually accompany this method. The third is to pull “a runner.” An empty apartment and a pissed off Korean director is the only thing you leave in your wake.

This third way invokes a certain nostalgic smirk from me after working at Oakley. There is rarely a hint of warning before someone takes these actions unless they are thoroughly malicious about it. Case in point: I have met a few waygukins that claim they will leave after six months and never tell their director because, “What are they gonna do about it?”

I find this to be very disrespectful. I don't mean to sound high and mighty over my way of handling a short lived contract, but if you have to leave and you know it, why not get it out of the way? Of course I know the main reason for this is to not have to reimburse the hagwon the airfare for getting you here. But the residual effects of this action can be staggering.

If you were a director at a hagwon, and you spent a lot of money on an employee and then they just up and left you what would you do? It would take well over a month to get a fulltime replacement for that person during which time students may quit your school to study at another hagwon that has a waygukin. So you'd loose money, have to hire a part time waygukin (yes, they exist, though most of them not entirely legally), and then spend more money to get another waygukin out to Korea and possibly pay a hefty recruiter fee (usually the equivalent of a months salary of the recruitee).

Now think about the psychological damage that could occur. Would you trust another waygukin again? How is this going to affect the other hagwon directors? Will they trust their waygukins? Now other waygukins have to deal with a severe lack of trust in their hagwon because of some idiot who couldn't handle confrontation?

If you think I'm being overdramatic then you should know there's about one runner a month in this city alone.

That being said, I feel even more confident in my departure knowing that I am leaving on a high note with my hagwon and Korea in general.

On that note, here are some pictures I've been meaning to put up for you all:

This is a “security guard” outside Ulsan University. I apologize for the blurriness, but I was trying to be quick incase the flash woke him up… it didn't.

While walking through the University we encountered a group practicing a traditional dance. It was really cool to see the mix of tradition and Nike shoes at 2 am in the morning.

Ah, Carten Blausen… I was taught this game while in Germany and have now officially passed it on to Korea. The object is to blow only one card off at a time. Improvise on consequences…

After six months without playing the bass guitar, Dave Ayers emerges to sit in on a bands performance. This was one of the best things I've ever seen in my life.

Konglish shirts: its best to not ask why or what they mean. This is another American (we're rare here, no joke) Erin. Her shirt reads: “In a Quiet and Clam Atmosphere.”

Here is my contribution to the Konglish world: “Its Exciting! Jumping on the Air”
The small print says: “Comfort and Pleasure.” Still not sure why there's a picture of a car… My best guess is hydraulics, but I've yet to see that here.

What do you say?